Comments on: Joint Checking Accounts for Married Couples: The Great Debate Over Joint vs. Separate Bank Accounts

By: Mbarber14

Mbarber14 — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 18:07:49 +0000

I tried a joint account. I finally got tired of having nothing at all because my husband does not think that we need to save $$. He spends everything we have and I just can’t do it anymore. It has made me completely miserable. I love him but this will be better. I don’t plan on having seperate accounts forever. I just need him to grow up. We have been married for 9 years.

By: kristina

kristina — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 06:11:58 +0000

Need help! Married for U years and tonight my husband says he wants separate accounts. We have always had issue with money as we are always low on funds after paying bills.
I have always paid bills bc he would forgetand we would have late fees.
I am a teacher and that is stable income. He is a car salesman and that can be 800 to 4500.
He purchased a balckberry w out communicating with me and eight months later I get one and tonight hetells me to cancel my phone internet bc I don’t need it but he does for work.
What do I do? I don’t see an easy way to split bc of the varying income. I am open to suggestions

By: Sadie

Sadie — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 01:19:37 +0000

It breaks my heart to hear this, for both of you. You are married to an addict. If it were drugs or gambling it would be the same problem. I wish for both of you that you could get her into counseling to recover from this addiction. There is something empty inside of her that she is trying to fill with things. She will never fill it though, no matter how much shopping she does. I know most people would divorce her, and that makes sense, but an intervention and getting her the help she needs should be tried first? I feel really bad for you, you sound like a good person who works hard and had faith in her the first time.The problem is, when someone does that behind your back it is hard to ever trust them again, but remember, this is an emotional problem and severe addiction on her part, she needs serious help.

By: mike

mike — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 23:10:29 +0000

my wife went behind my back and opened a retirement/insurance account that is taking 300.00 auto out of her separate bank account,which she opened without talking about it. she did the insurance thing , right when we decided to look for a house,and for me to quit my 60k yr to start school for a new career. we were just at the end game for a house when i found out she did the insurance thing. plus asked for 15 % to be taking out of her pay for 401k. each time i ask to discuss budgeting and finances she gets irritated and holtile . then she decided to take her pay from the joint account and put it into her bank. i had online banking thru the joint acc. and have all the bills set up out of it. now i can’t feel compfy that she has any mature responsiblity . she hates money so she spends it, sounds like an oxymoron ? sounds like a divorce looming.. she does all this after buying a house and convincing me start a new career.. ugg

By: Alicia

Alicia — Wed, 14 Dec 2011 03:39:36 +0000

Looks like I am a lucky one. My husband and I do have a joint checking account where we deposit our money. We used to try and keep everything separate and split everything down the middle but it was just such a pain to do every week. We worked out a budget between the two of us and just stick to that. We don’t make a lot of money so really the budget goes to bills and food and we don’t have an opportunity to fight over some of the stuff that I read on the comments. After reading some of the stories about husbands and wife gambling away houses and such, it just makes me thankful for my husband and our life. Clearly joint doesn’t work for everyone, but I think it is something you should figure out before you get married. You also need to be aware of the other persons financial situation before hand.

By: Anonymous

Anonymous — Sun, 20 Nov 2011 04:17:47 +0000

I am so sorry to hear this. Perhaps y’all should see a counselor. The root of the spending problem is probably deeper than it seems. Best of luck to you!

By: Jessica

Jessica — Sun, 02 Oct 2011 18:49:13 +0000

I think its probably time, I can’t believe anyone would even think to do that to their husband!

By: Eddy

Eddy — Sun, 18 Sep 2011 05:09:44 +0000

My wife and I have been married 18 years. Early in our marriage she would spend, spend, spend. We were in so much debt it almost destroyed us. I explained to her that I can’t live like that and that if she does not change her spending habits we’ll never last as a couple. She straightened up for a few years and we got out of debt, salvaged our credit, and saved over $7,000.00 (which was great for us). I was moved to another postion at my company which was very demanding. My wife works at a bank and was doing very good managing the bank account. I THOUGHT. So, I gave the checkbook over to her to take care of the bills. One day I received a bill from a credit card with a $1,700.00 charge on it! I immediately got on the phone calling the cc company (thinking someone had lifted my cc number). Then I noticed my wifes facial expression. We had received the blank checks in the mail from my credit card company which was only in my name. She secretly deposited them into our account and spent all of it. And come to find out she had been secretly shopping, getting other high interest loans to support her habit and then went to 4 different cash advance businesses and got 4 $500.00 payroll check advances. I started looking into our finances to see how bad the damage was and found that we were 3 months behind on our mortgage, two months behind on both vehicles and she opened a Victorias Secrets account, Sears, Old Navy, Belk, and maxed them out! I told her I am taking the finances over again but she has opened another checking account which her check is automatically deposited and she refuses to give ANY toward the bills and help me help our situation. I am ready to let the marriage go. She refuses to be a team.

By: Me, Myself, & I

Me, Myself, & I — Thu, 15 Sep 2011 19:35:17 +0000

Dear Me:

I read your post. OMGosh!! You and your husband are exactly the same story as my husband and I. It’s refreshing to know that I’m not the only wife out there. We decided just last night that we are going to try separate checking accounts. Enough is enough, I say!

By: Nicki

Nicki — Tue, 06 Sep 2011 18:17:20 +0000

I am a firm believer in spearate accounts. My husband is not. I could see sharing accounts if you ARE able to sit down together, pay bills, etc… but my husband and I operate very differently (I’m more organized, he is not) and our schedules are opposite (he works nights and weekends). I don’t think we’d be able to find the time to sit down every two weeks and go through everything, and since we both want our hands “in it” so to speak, separate is the only way to go for us.